Thursday, March 12, 2009

It's so unfunny, it's hilarious!

Caution: Everything you don't want to read about below... continue at your own risk!

Withing maybe 1/2 hour today this is how the events unfolded. Children's identities have been reduced to numbers to help protect their identity :0) He he he...

Update: I didn't want to name the children in this post while they were in foster care because I was still unclear of the rules surrounding sharing information about the kids in our care. But now, 2 years later, there doesn't seem to be any harm in identifying the kids for clarity sake. Child #1 was Titus (3 years, 3 months). Child #2 was Hope (4 years, 1 month). Child #3 was Logan (5 years 7 months) and child #4 was Leeann (5 years, 8 months). This day unfolded about a week after moving my half siblings into our home. That day was so traumatic, I still remember it like it was yesterday!

Child #1 gets sent to bed for a nap because of behavior and a bad attitude that obviously indicated a need for one.

Children #2 and #3 get separated into different rooms while I put child #1 down (who obviously didn't want to be put down).

Child #2 gets mad that something she wants is on child #3's side of the baby gate, so child #2 throws something large on the the other side of the baby gate, and starts screaming. Child #3 actually handles this whole scenario nicely!

Sister/Mommy places child #2 onto her bed for a time out that she's secretly hoping would turn into a nap since her behavior also indicates a need for one.

Child #2 spends the next 1/2 hour screaming at the top of her lungs, and removes every sheet, blanket, toy and pillow from her bed in an angry fit. Child #2 then bolts to the other side of the room to sit in the rocking chair.

Sister/Mommy tries not to scream and throw a fit herself. Sister/Mommy sees so much of herself as a child in child #2 that she wants to laugh and throw a fit all at the same time.

Sister/Mommy sends child #3 downstairs for a snack.

Child #4 runs to the bathroom and starts upchucking in the sink.

Sister/Mommy sets child #2 back into her bed for the 3rd or 4th time.

Sister/Mommy wants to cry. Instead, Sister/Mommy calls in reinforcements, who happens to already be on his way home from work to get something. Talk about timing. Child #2... still screaming.

Sister/Mommy tucks child #4 into bed with a towel underneath and a bucket just in case.

Reinforcement walks in and immediately goes to try to calm down child #2. After a few minutes with the reinforcement, child #2 starts to return to a normal state. Reinforcement sets time-out timer for 5 minutes.

Reinforcement walks out of child #2's room hoping to recap the chaos that just ensued.

Before any words can be exchanged between Mommy/Sister and Reinforcement, child #3 walks upstairs, finished with his snack. Mommy/Sister smells something funny and asks if child #3 is poopy. Child #3 denies. Reinforcement asks again, if child #3 is poopy. Child #3 starts to deny the accusation, but then decides to fess-up.

Reinforcement gently escorts child #3 to the bath tub to get him (and his clothes) cleaned up. Child #3 is not in diapers, mind you. Reinforcement and Mommy/Sister team up to tackle the clothes, one rinsing the other spraying Shout like mad. Reinforcement (who doesn't do well with bodily fluids) nearly gags himself into his own upchucking session, but regains his composure, and helps get a bath going.

Timer goes off in child #2's room. Child #2 apologizes to Mommy/Sister, and we have a hug fest and get on our merry way.

Child #1 wakes up. Seriously? What kind of a nap was that?

Sister/Mommy gets snack for children #1 and #2. Goes to check on child #4.

Reinforcement finishes child #3's bath and informs Sister/Mommy that he has to go back to work. Sister/Mommy tries not to cry over this information!

Children #1 - #3 go off to play merrily together now that all the chaos is calming down. Child #4 drifts back to la-la land for the 3rd time today.

Sister/Mommy decides that when life hands you lemons, the best way to turn it into lemonade is to blog about it and at least let others have a good laugh! Just as Sister/Mommy starts to blog, Child #3 starts shrieking about the smell permeating from the diaper of child #1. Delightful, just delightful!


While re-reading this post prior to posting, child #3 is in time-out as is child #2 who is throwing another large screaming fit. Calgon, take me away!


Deborah said...

Thanks for sharing. I had a good laugh :) I can completely identify.

Haven't the magic nickles made everything peacful yet? :)


Robyn said...

They haven't made everything more peaceful... but some things for sure. Unfortunately I can't bribe away accidents and illnesses!

Jessi said...

Oh are more than amazing! And yes, I had huge laugh at the thought of this, until I really thought about it and realized how much you must be wanting some alone time! You should take a poll about what kid is what number! Hope your evening is much better! And I'll be praying for the sick baby!

beachbirdie said...

Oh my gosh. Thanks for the laugh. I know it's not fun when you're in the middle of it though!

All I can say is "been there, done that." And, as my mom used to tell me (between dare she be laughing!) when I would call her on days like the one you just blogged, "this, too, shall pass"!

tbierly said...

Darn, Deborah beat me to the punch on inquiring about nickels. After that post the other day, I was converted. But now, I think I'm going to have to take time to reconsider. Or maybe it was the lack of nickels that precipitated this exciting 1/2 hour melee. Sure, you can blame "accidents" and "illness", but did you try offering Child #4 a nickel to not bark at ants?

Anonymous said... are such a trooper! Thanks for sharing this. I was laughing my head off, but was feeling so so bad for you at same time! Love ya lots! Just remember to take one day at a time....well, maybe just one hour at time for now! :)